Cohabitation: A Guide to Domestic Living (for the Boyz)

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Today’s letter is C, and the word is cohabitation. The following is an article inspired by the lovely ladies of the SST chat room, during a discussion about relationships.  We tried really hard not to man-bash.  And this is much better than the lame post I started earlier about courage and writing, I promise. Thanks to Lieserl for her suggestion!

So you want to move in with a woman? Congratulations; you’ve managed to fool someone into actually wanting to see you in the morning!  Every day!  You either look pretty good, she’s hypnotized, or you’ve mastered the art of sneaking into the bathroom first!

Let’s hope you’re not doing this because you’re after her bank account, you need a place to hide from the feds or you’re a lazy bastard who wants someone to take care of him.  And it’s probably not a good idea to move in with someone you’ve only known for three weeks.

If you’re going to move in with a woman, you need to learn some rules first.

  • PUT THE DAMN SEAT DOWN.  Every time.  Get used to it because she will NOT like you if she keeps falling in.
  • She is not your maid; she is your girlfriend.  If you want a maid, hire one.  Women are not here to wait on your stupid ass.  Pick up your mess!  Help out around the house.  Do the dishes, take out the trash (a traditional manly chore), do the laundry, make dinner once in a while.  Even better, if you want to get some, do it without being asked.  Women love that.
  • More people break up over money than anything else.  You need to sit down and agree about the division of bills, rent and groceries.  Be responsible.  You spend all the food money on the latest PS3 game and you’re eating the cat’s dinner.  I wouldn’t blame her one bit.
  • If you’re dating a woman long-term and you’re living together, don’t act like it means nothing to you just to show how manly you are.  The first time you forget to introduce her to someone or call her “the old ball and chain,” she is going to be pissed.  I mean royally.  This is the person you have chosen to spend most of your time with, so be considerate.
  • Running late? Let her know so she can adjust her own plans.  You know how she always texts you to tell you where she’s going so you can find her if you need to?  Do the same thing.  Unless she’s a jealous bitch, in which case I don’t know why you’re bothering, she wants to know because she cares whether you’re stuck in traffic or dead in a ditch.  If you’re dead, then she gets the PS3.
  • It’s fine for you to have a night out with your boys, but don’t abuse the privilege.  She moved in (or let you move in with her) because she wants to spend time with you, not sit in front of the TV alone, stare at her watch and wonder for the fifth weekend in a row why she thought this was a good idea.
  • Couples who are together for a long while sometimes get bored or boring in the bedroom.  Mix it up a bit.  Try to think of new activities.  Women take longer to become fully aroused than men, so take your time.  The more she thinks you are focused on her, the happier she’ll be and the more chances you’ll get.  It’ll be better for you too.  Trust me.
  • Remember your girl has feelings, and they will run the gamut.  Now that you’re living together, she’ll feel free to let them go and you may see things you never saw before.  What happens when something breaks.  How tired she really is after work, with no time to get it together before you show up.  The first time you witness her full-blown PMS.  A great boyfriend will take it in stride and nurture her when she needs it.  If she cries over a movie, please refrain from saying “F***’s wrong with you?”
  • Breaking up is harder when you’re living together, because one or both of you will have to move.  This may happen to you.  No state I know has community property laws governing domestic living arrangements that don’t include marriage, so be cool about shared stuff.  You’ll have to work it out without the benefit of the courts.

You were decent to her when you got together or she wouldn’t be with you, so be decent if you break up.  She’ll remember that.  Word gets around and unless you cheated or did something equally heinous, your gentlemanly behavior will follow you.

People in a healthy, positive relationship bring out the best in each other.  You’re an adult in an adult relationship, so act like one.

Be Good or Be Gone

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Today’s topic is business behavior.  Creative writers might mutter, “Why do I have to know about business etiquette? I’m a fiction writer.  I don’t write for corporations or marketers.”  Well, yes you do.  A publisher is a business.  So is the agency that represents you.  Just because you’re an artist or craftsperson doesn’t give you permission to be unprofessional in your demeanor when dealing with these people.  And if you’re a freelancer, your behavior will win or lose you clients.

The general rules of good business behavior incorporate communication and presentation.  Writing is a business like any other, and writers would do well to remember them.

  • Dress appropriately.  If you work from home, a dress code probably isn’t necessary, but for appointments and meetings you should wear something polished and classy.  Once when I was a kid, I asked my mother why we dressed up for church.  God doesn’t care what I wear, I argued, so why can’t I wear shorts?  She replied that sloppy clothes were disrespectful.  Now God isn’t signing my paycheck, but the same rule applies.  If I showed up to a meeting in raggy shorts or jeans and a t-shirt, sneakers and no makeup, the implication is that I can’t be bothered.  That won’t make anyone eager to deal with me.
  • Be on time.  Don’t be late for appointments and don’t miss deadlines.  If you must, call.  A phone call shows more personal care than an email or text.
  • Don’t make it hard to find you.  Make sure your contact information is at the bottom of your email, and speak it clearly when you leave a voice mail.  If someone calls you and leaves a message, return their call in a timely manner.  Their time is as valuable as yours and it’s rude to keep people waiting.  If they need an update on something and you don’t have one, don’t ignore them.  At least let them know there is no change.
  • Manners.  Be polite like your mommy said.  Say “please” and “thank you” and “excuse me.”  Don’t be rude back to thoughtless people; answering poor behavior with your own only makes you sink to that level.  Dealing with clients and customers can be infuriating, but they are your bread and butter.  Try to see their side of things before making any snap judgments.

A common saying is “The customer is always right.”  I don’t think that is true.  There are some customers who, no matter what you do, will never be satisfied or always demand something extra out of a sense of entitlement.  If it’s too stressful or expensive to deal with them, remember you can fire your customers.  You have no obligation to do business with them, especially if they don’t pay their bills or are underhanded in some way.   If you must let them go, do so respectfully.  Don’t burn bridges.

  • Give your all.  Polish, polish, polish and edit, edit, edit.  You should be spending nearly the same amount of time editing as you did writing a piece.  Check and recheck your work for typos, etc.  No one is perfect and sometimes they will slip through, but if you make a list of things to look for and habitually follow it, checking your work will become second nature to you.  Then you’ll hardly ever hand in something less than your best.  If you don’t know how to format your queries and submissions, get on the Internet and find out.  There’s no excuse these days for not learning the rules of the game.

In the writing world, your competition is fierce.  People who are serious about their careers will take the time to learn how to properly present their work and themselves.  Your messy, misspelled and smudgy letter or submission might stand out, but not the way you wanted.  The inappropriate clothing you wore to lunch with your agent or client (and you were late, too) tells him or her you don’t have it together.  Who wants to work with someone like that?

Please share any other rules I might have left out in the comments.

Ambition: Why I Would Kill to Be Published!

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I have begun a blog challenge!  arlee bird at tossing it out has challenged bloggers to write a post a day, except Sundays, through the month of April.  Each post will begin with a letter of the alphabet, in order from A to Z.

I wasn’t sure what to write for today.   A chat friend of mine suggested this post’s title in a moment of levity and I had nothing else, so I went with it.  I don’t think I ever really thought about this.  I just assumed that if I were going to be a writer, eventually I would publish.  Why do it if no one is going to read it?  There are people who write purely for their own enjoyment, or for a very small, select group of readers, but why beat your head against the brick wall of publishing for what could be a small return in terms of money, time and recognition?

These might be some reasons.  Are they mine?

  • Money.  If you want to get rich writing, it doesn’t generally happen.  I hear tell you can make a living at it though, and that would be fine for me.  A bestseller would be nice (or a string of them!), but I think I’d rather be comfortable than dripping with wealth.  If it happens, I’m not going to say no.  Realistically, I’m not expecting it.
  • Prestige and/or credits.  Being published is an accomplishment.  For fiction writers, it can be terribly difficult to break in.  Technical experts who do pieces for trade magazines, freelance article and content writers and copywriters have a ready market for their work, if they take the time to network and seek clients.  Fiction is subjective.  It has to appeal to a publication’s readers or fit the market up to a year ahead for books, a tough thing to predict.  If you’re trying to write as a career, a published credit is good.  I have almost nothing on my resumé right now and it’s disheartening.

There is a myth that you must be published to get published.  I have heard countless writers say on their blogs that THIS IS NOT TRUE!  Everyone has to begin somewhere, even if it’s an article about cows on the back page of Local Farming Monthly. One science fiction and fantasy writer with a long and impressive list of books published told attendees at VisionCon last year that he started out writing erotica!

  • Attention.  This can be a good or bad thing.  If you’re comfortable doing presentations of your work, or being interviewed or even lecturing on your subject if your research is extensive, then you’ll probably be fine.  If not, you won’t be comfortable with the marketing part of the business.
  • A chance to be heard.  I kind of like this one.  I often feel that no one listens to me and I would love it if people not only read my work but discussed it.  Not diss it, however.  I’d rather not have a book club making fun of me the way some people make fun of Twilight.  Which is fun, by the way.  No, I’m kidding.*

You can avoid this by working obsessively on your craft.  I already covered that in my post Unneccesary Roughness.  Practice and the willingness to learn will never be a waste of time.

  • Love of writing.  Yes, I do love it.  I greatly missed it when I was bogged down in schoolwork.  I like the challenge of creating characters and moving them through their worlds and coming up with things for them to do.  It’s fun to put down my dreams, fantasies and the imaginings I enjoy when stuck in line somewhere or in the doctor’s waiting room.  I’m lucky to be able to articulate them.  I hope you enjoy them; that is, if they are ever published!

I don’t think I would kill to be published—that would be a bit extreme.  The more I learn about the business, the tougher the challenge seems, but the better equipped I feel to meet it.  Thanks to already-published writers out there who are kind enough to share their insights, struggles and advice on craft and the journey to publication, we UNPUBs know better what to expect.  I would especially like to thank Anne Mini, Anne Wayman and Nicola Morgan, aka the Crabbit Old Bat!

If you have any thoughts to share about this subject, please post them in the comments.

*not!

Just Call Me —?

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I’m at lunch and I just glopped bean burrito all over my touchpad.  Yesterday a cracker crumb went into my keyboard.  If only I could work away from food.  Ah, the life of a writer with a day job!

Just when you thought you had your characters down, their quirks and habits and backgrounds and appearances all in line, it’s time to pick their names.  The process is as difficult for some as choosing baby names.  How do you know what the right moniker is for your heroine, your sidekick or your villain?  What if you can’t think of a name at all, or only ordinary, unimpressive ones?

I’m lucky, I guess.  Names aren’t difficult for me; titles are.  I’ll write a post about that someday, if I ever figure out a way to come up with a great one.  I used to use baby name books (although I’ve lost the book someone gave me) or the name generators on the Internet.  Numerous websites abound with all kinds of ethnic names, traditional, trendy or bizarre.  But how do you actually choose one?

Baby name books usually contain a name’s meanings and all of its derivatives, so that’s one place to start.  You might want your character’s name to reflect her personality.  So a brave character, defender of the downtrodden, could be Richard, Old English meaning “brave one.”  Or you could use a name to show ironic character traits.  Try a bitchy, selfish woman named Charity, or an atheist named Faith.  Pick something that hasn’t been used a million times.  If I see one more plucky heroine named Kate, I think I’m going to scream my lungs out.

If you want something different or unusual, try a man’s name for a woman (Blair, Morgan).  A boy named Sue would be hard to pull off, but in the right story, who knows?  It could be great. In fantasy or science fiction, you will have to think up entirely new names.  Tolkien’s Frodo Baggins has a name that fits him perfectly and is completely unique to the story.

Some names have acquired certain connotations.  We expect someone called Sheldon, Herb or Bernice to be nerdy.  A person named Alice, Johnny or Susie may not be childlike and innocent, but we think they will be.  Tiffany or Britney conjures up a post-adolescent mean girl or pop princess-type.

Very elaborate or difficult names make readers tired.  In an old Peanuts cartoon, Charlie Brown asked Linus how he could read Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s The Brothers Karamazov, with all those hard Russian names.  Linus replied, “I just bleep right over them!”  Well, it works, but it’s tough to keep up with who’s who.   Keep it simple, if you’re writing plot-driven, genre fiction.  You don’t want to distract your reader from the story.

I’ve heard much advice about not choosing major characters’ names that begin with the same letter.  I did that in Rose’s Hostage.  The bank robber and serial killer’s names both begin with J:  Joshua and John.  I might have to change it later, but I’d rather not.  Those are the names I feel fit them best.  Sometimes the reasons for a name choice are not meaningful, but practical.  My heroine’s name is Libby Ann.  I had a very clear picture of her, but I couldn’t think of her name.  After making a long list, I chose it not as a permutation of my own name, not for any particular significance, but because it was easy to type.

I discovered an unusual names source at work:  spam email.  It had tons of names in all kinds of crazy combinations.  I copied the obviously-fake names and put them into a file on my computer.  I can mix them up later and come up with new pairings.  Also, keep your ears open when you’re in the mall, airports, anyplace people are talking, and eavesdrop a little.  You might hear a name that’s perfect for a new character.

Whatever name you pick, it should feel right for that person.  You can always change it later if you’re not happy.  But you’ll be more comfortable climbing inside your character’s skin if you know what she is called and how it relates to her vision of herself.

Get Off Your Tuchus!

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Writing makes you fat.

Yes, it’s true.  Fat.  Corpulent.  Flabby.  Or rather, it can, unless you take steps to prevent or remedy the situation.   Think about it.  If you write during your free time, or full-time, your butt is parked in front of a computer for most of the day, right? Add a sedentary job to that, if you haven’t reached the full-time Nirvana, and you’re probably not getting a whole lot of exercise.

Everyone knows the basics of keeping healthy.  We’re writers; we can read, and we know how to look up information in the library, on the Internet, etc.  That doesn’t mean we do.  It doesn’t mean we take the advice we read, whether it’s about how to edit a paragraph or stay in shape.

Here are some ways writing can add bulk to your bod:

  • You’re sitting.  The only things moving are your fingers and your brain, and that doesn’t burn a whole lot of calories, even though it can take a colossal amount of energy.  I spent an entire day on the couch writing the very end of the first draft of my book and believe me, I was exhausted.
  • Sometimes people nosh when they write.  Even if you don’t write, if you spent any time in school cramming for an exam, you’re familiar with marathon study sessions accompanied by mounds of snacks.  I don’t know about you, but I wasn’t apt to eat a salad when I studied.  It was usually chips, pizza, sandwiches and sweets I could munch with one hand while I turned pages with the other.  Add a study buddy and the potential for fast food consumption rises exponentially.  Also, it’s easy to grab something junky if you’re anxious to get back to a chapter, instead of taking time to fix a healthy meal.
  • It does take energy to create.  When you get up after a long writing session, your bones creak, your muscles are stiff and you’re probably going to be tired.   The last thing you’ll feel like doing is exercising.  It’s much easier to not do it, so people don’t.

See how it’s easy for the pounds to pile up?

Hazards of being overweight include:

  • Low energy
  • A higher risk of disease such as heart problems and diabetes
  • Risk of blood clots from inactivity (I’ve had one, from a medication problem; believe me, you don’t want this.  It can kill you quickly.  Besides, it hurts like hell.)
  • Decreased mobility
  • Shorter lifespan
  • Depression
  • Breathing difficulties

Obesity is a huge problem in this country.  I’m not on a soapbox here, however.  I just want you to remember that not moving isn’t going to do you any good.

How can you counteract this?

  • If you have a regular exercise routine, good for you.  Don’t abandon it if you get deep into a project.  Exercise is great for thinking; Beethoven used to ramble for hours in the woods around Vienna, Austria, and he often said he was inspired by his long walks and the time spent communing with nature.  He certainly produced some of the world’s best music, so I’m inclined to listen to him.
  • If you start a routine, begin slowly.  You should always see a doctor before starting a fitness regimen, to make sure you aren’t overexerting yourself.  If you can only walk for fifteen minutes, or do a few reps of an exercise, that’s fine for a start.  Build up gradually.  You’ll get there if you just keep at it.
  • Get rid of the junk food.  Keep plenty of fruit and / or cut-up veggies (watch the dip!) around to munch.  If you have kids and you’re in the habit of making these for them, simply prepare extra for yourself.  When you break for lunch or dinner, have fish, lean meat or poultry, veggies, whole grains and drink your milk and water.
  • Eat regularly.  Don’t skip meals, especially breakfast!  People who eat breakfast jumpstart their metabolism in the morning and this helps them stay thinner than those who don’t.  It also helps you stay away from the crap food before lunch.  Three meals and two healthy snacks should suffice.
  • While you’re writing, get up and stretch every once in a while.  A good time to do this is when you take a bathroom break.  Take a few moments to reach for the ceiling, touch your toes, do a few jumping jacks or go outside for a moment.  Get the circulation moving and blood will not settle and clot.  Your brain and heart will thank you.  It will keep you awake too, if you’re working on something less than exciting.
  • Get plenty of sleep.  Learn to structure your time so you can fit a bit of writing into your day if it’s very full, or use your time wisely if it’s not.  Recent studies have shown a link between lack of sleep and weight gain, and it’s much harder both to exercise and think if you are tired.

All of the above applies to studying too, so if you’re a college student, remember to take frequent breaks, eat healthy snacks, and get plenty of rest.

If anyone has any tips on staying healthy for writers, please share them in the comments.



Patience

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So sorry I made you wait for a new post.  It’s been a busy week.  Sad to say, I haven’t gotten a great deal of writing done, but Life intruded.

This weekend I flew out of state to visit a new friend.  Trying to save a little money and maximize our time together, I decided to leave from a larger airport and to do so very early in the morning.  I figured at five a.m. no one is likely to be going anywhere, right?

Wrong!  The line going through security was incredible.  It began at the bottom of the stairs and stretched around the corner and all the way down an interminable hallway, where it snaked back and forth for a few roped-off sections before spilling out into the security area.  I was frustrated beyond belief, glancing at my watch and shifting my feet, about to cry.  I had not only packed properly, but limited myself to one carry-on, my purse and a gift bag.  I wasn’t even checking a bag and still got caught in this mess!

I made it through security in thirty seconds flat, jammed my shoes and jacket back on and ran to my gate, only to find my flight had closed ten minutes before.  After a reroute, an extra changeover and a couple of infuriating weather-related delays, I made it.  I only lost four hours with my friend instead of the entire weekend.  That was a long four hours though, especially the last delay.

Patience is a great virtue for a writer.  You have to wait to hear back from a query (if you ever do), wait for research subjects to get back to you, fight the frustration of writer’s block or the race to finish a piece.  I hear tell money can be slow coming in.  Any freelancer knows about that one.  And then there is the long, slow slog toward being published.  For most people, it can take years.  That’s where patience really comes into play.  If you’re the type to give up easily, this is not the career for you.

I’m easily frustrated and impatient as hell, but when it counts I can stick to it like nobody’s business.  No matter what, I’ll keep trying.  If I truly enjoy someone’s company and the feeling is mutual, then I’ll hang through thick and thin.  If I like what I’m doing, I’m much more likely to keep doing it.  That’s not a problem here.  I love writing, so I do it even if no one reads it.  Of course, after years of keeping it to myself the time has come to put it out there.  And so another round of patient waiting begins.

Unlike waiting for a plane, waiting for a break in writing is an evolving thing.  While you exercise that patience there is much to do.  Practice makes perfect.  Your craft demands that you continually improve.  Lessons and exercises, journal entries and posts, editing and drafting and scouring agent websites and synopses and queries will fill your time.  And of course, writing.  Always writing.

Keep doing it.  As you wait and write, you will build an oeuvre, a body of work that even if unpublishable will show you how far you’ve come.  You’ll go back and look at your old stuff and laugh, perhaps cringe at an awkward POV or lack of scene breaks.  You’ll come across a phrase or passage so good it inspires something new.  You’ll read the work of others and growl jealously even as you feverishly thumb through white-hot pages, or laugh delightedly at a fresh turn of phrase.  Then you’ll hit the page again yourself in a frenzy of creation.  The wait is its own reward.

Conflict Schmonflict

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Don’t you hate people for whom everything comes easily, or seems to?  Everything goes smoothly for them, they never have any glitches, and if they do they always know the right person to call or where to seek answers.  Those of us who struggle with the daily details of life resent them.

Of course, you could argue that there are probably hidden areas of their lives that are seething with conflict.  And here lies interest.  As in real life, conflict in a story shows character, in how your protagonist reacts to it and how he handles it.

Ashley is the protagonist in your imaginary novel.  She is pretty, accomplished, has a loving boyfriend named Garth and a wonderful family.  She sees her parents regularly, she and her siblings get along, and she has a well-paying and engaging career (insert fabulous job here).  Everything is perfect.  If Ashley goes through the novel without any of these details changing, the reader will fall asleep.  Ashley is boring.   Ashley could also be described as author wish fulfillment.  Either way, who wants to read about someone whose life is perfect?

Something has to happen for Ashley to keep the reader’s interest.  Something she holds dear must be threatened.  Her boyfriend could break up with her.  Is that enough?  Well, it might be, if it drives her to change her life somehow or she meets someone more dramatic, as in a women’s fiction or romance tome.  In a thriller or mystery, her boyfriend could kill or be framed for killing her parents.  She could stand by him and poof, there goes the job and the siblings.  How will Ashley find her way out of this dilemma?  Fantasy or horror could find Ashley fighting monsters from a parallel dimension who threaten her perfect life, a zombie serial killer or aliens taking over her town.

Each scene must lead to more conflict or the reader won’t care about Ashley anymore.  You must set up the character so that the reader will believe she is capable of handling the conflict and won’t simply fall apart.  She should have some lurking problem area where her reaction will let us know her better.

In Robert R. McCammon’s 1990 novel Mine, the pregnant protagonist Laura is concerned about her struggling marriage.  She hopes the new baby will bring her and her distant husband together again.  The character begins the novel with conflict already in place.  Laura isn’t sure what to do about her husband, but she knows her baby will have all of her even if he doesn’t have his father.  McCammon gets to explore Laura here, and we can see her personality, her doubts and her fears about the future.

Back to Ashley.  Say you take the thriller/mystery angle.  Perhaps you could set up some uncertainty with Garth, or with his relationship to her parents.  Maybe the parents don’t like him, but Ashley knows he is a good man.  Her faith in his integrity presents a problem later.

Ashley comes home from her job one day to find Garth in her apartment, covered with blood.  He runs out the door and vanishes.  The police come and tell her that her parents are dead, killed with a knife that has Garth’s fingerprints all over it.  From there begins the character’s quest to clear her boyfriend’s name and find the real killer.  How will she do that?

Because you took the time to establish doubt about Garth’s integrity earlier, the conflict has more legs.  Ashley will not only have to search for her parents’ killer, but fight the harsh attitude of her siblings, who may believe Garth actually did kill them.  Why else would he run?

The search for a killer and a man’s innocence will work fine by itself in a mystery.  In a straight thriller, you might have to ramp up the conflict and make it more dangerous.  In Mine, for example, Laura’s baby is kidnapped from the hospital.  Unfortunately for her, it’s not an ordinary barren woman who takes little David, but a deadly fugitive radical named Mary Terror, who is following her hallucinations to her former lover and the leader of their now-defunct underground group, baby in tow.  The life of Laura’s child is in jeopardy, a powerful motivator.  Desperate to find her son, she takes it on herself to follow Mary and the action begins.

Laura has to grow to meet her challenge.  She finds herself doing things she never imagined she could do.  The errant and useless husband is discarded.  The only focus she has now is to find her baby.  Along the way, numerous problems arise that add to her frustration and fear, and keep the stakes high.

Keep the conflict moving.  If Ashley could walk out the door, find a mysterious letter that clears Garth’s name and turn it in to the police, then the story would be over.  It helps sometimes to think in terms of a film adaptation; since film has to get to the bare bones of the story quickly, extraneous asides are often eliminated.  You can use this as an exercise to draw out the conflict and keep it focused.  Ashley could start getting mysterious hang-up calls, and her car might be disabled, or her life threatened as she gets closer to discovering who killed her parents and why.  If you build on the original conflict and thwart her repeatedly as she goes, she will have to think laterally to get around obstacles and change to meet the new challenges.  This will keep the reader engaged in her plight.

And don’t forget to give her a reason to keep going, like Laura saving her baby.  Could she begin to have doubts about Garth herself?  Sure, if it will make the story more interesting.  But something should happen to convince her that he is innocent, and that he needs her help.  Otherwise she might give up entirely and move on.  The reader probably wouldn’t buy that; he/she would want to know everything and if you don’t deliver, you’ve lost a reader.

You should give Garth some face time as well.  His conflicts will allow you to introduce the villain who framed him and provide a link to Ashley through that character or the difficulties he/she sets up for her.  Weave a web of intrigue for her to navigate.  Let her save, or try to save, her boyfriend.  How it ends is up to you.

Whether your character’s conflicts are internal or external or a mixture of both, every scene you write must drive the resolution of that conflict.  If you prefer to have your character acted upon, make sure you have a good reason for it.  Most thriller readers prefer a protagonist who helps himself, but in the right story, a victim can make an engaging character provided she has some degree of autonomy.  Even if Ashley does fall apart, she has to make decisions sooner or later, even if they’re bad ones.  In literary fiction, a helpless approach might work if you’re exploring your character’s inner life.  In The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, James Thurber’s character did nothing in the real world, but in his mind was a daring and brave adventurer.

Give your character stuff to do.  Her actions and how she deals with conflict will establish her as a well-rounded person.   If you have noticed any good examples of conflict you would like to share, please note them in the comments.

Shiny New

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Today I made a red lentil dahl, an Indian dish composed of lentils with spices cooked in oil.  The recipe didn’t call for them, but I added onions because I like them, and used minced garlic instead of garlic powder.  I also used red lentils instead of brown.  I like brown but I didn’t want to wait for them to cook.  I’m not very knowledgeable about Indian cuisine, but I like to experiment a bit.  The recipe, which I found online, was quite tasty even though the poster said it wasn’t strictly authentic.  Not all my culinary adventures turn out well, but this one did.  Now my house smells like cumin.

It’s good to try new things.  Writing in different genres and forms is the only way you will discover which ones fit best.  Some experiments might not be successful, but where would we be if we didn’t try?

Poetry, for example, isn’t my strong point, but every once in a while I do come up with something.  I envy those who write strong verse, whether it rhymes or not.  Good poetry has a rhythm, a power to it that goes beyond the words.  You can feel it in the best stuff even when you read it to yourself, and it’s spectacular when spoken.  I’m afraid mine isn’t that good.  Yes, okay, here’s an example.

Shining like a new penny, in pocket black

Tell me where the hiding place is

For your deepest feelings.

Tell me what is lurking in the darkness of your soul

Or do you even know?

Is it worth the copper glow?

Or is it dull and ordinary, telling by its smudgy worn texture

How many times you have taken it, and worried it,

And tried to give it away?

How many times was it returned to you, and

Did you polish it again

Before you tried to give it to me?

I don’t know or care who held it or how long it wandered.

I’ll take it and hold it,

If you give it freely,

If you love with all your heart.

That was the result of a writing exercise using a cliché, in this case “new penny.”  The point of the exercise was to use words in a new way, ascribing meaning to them through metaphor or interpretation, and made them fresh.  For me, poetry is playing.   I don’t know if I succeeded, but it was fun.

New forms and expressions enrich your work, and trying new things in life do the same.  There is research and there is doing something or experiencing something firsthand, like making dahl.  If I were to write about an Indian woman cooking for her family, I would need to know not only how her food is prepared, but what it smells like, how it tastes, its texture and color.  If I have never experienced Indian cuisine, I would not know these things.  Telling readers about the recipe is fine, but no description beyond that doesn’t give the writing any real flavor (pardon the pun).

Not all writers work this way.  Bram Stoker, author of Dracula, wrote authentically about Transylvania without ever having been there.  For some people and subjects, research will suffice but for others, knowing is better.  I prefer to have a little feel for what I’m writing about.  I have a story lurking in the back of my head about a mountain climber.  I’ve learned a few things about climbing but have never attempted it.  It’s something I would like to try, if I could get over my fear of heights, but given that it’s an expensive sport and there are no real mountains where I live, this one is going to have to wait.  The sport is simply too technical to describe without attempting to learn more.

Besides authentic detail, trying new things enriches you.  It keeps your brain working and stretches your emotional range.  All this makes your writing better.  You don’t have to be a closeted recluse to write.  Get out there and live.

Please share in the comments how your experiences have translated well into your art.

What Title Page?!

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I’ve been following an excellent blog called Author! Author! by Anne Mini (the link is in my blogroll, or click on the title in this post).  She has dedicated her time to giving writers very detailed advice about everything from character-building to contracts. For some weird reason my browser hates to magnify her page, but I’ll squint because everything she says is worth it.

Her last series of posts is on manuscript formatting.  Now, I thought I had that down.  Turns out that a newbie like me is also an idiot who doesn’t know poo from Pooh.  Her advice has prompted a spate of revision from which my poor book will hopefully emerge in a more marketable form.

Before reformatting, I had to address word count.  Most genre books average around 80,000 – 90,000 words. A few push 100,000 but not many, unless you’re talking about fantasy, which can end up with crazy word counts because of the need to establish an alternate universe.  My crime thriller started at 110,000, then during rewrites swelled to 125,000.  At last revision, it had gone down to 112,200.

The longer a book is, the more paper it take to print, the more it costs, and it’s less likely an agent is going to bite.  It’s not The Lord of the Rings, but it was still too damn long.  4100 words have come out and are still bleeding from the page.

As I posted in “Slice and Dice,” extras can go bye-bye and will reduce your count considerably. A long description of a place or someone’s outfit can take up a lot of room.  So can interior monologue. It’s tempting to go all stream-of-consciousness on the reader when your character is contemplating something, but keep it short.  I cut a ton of blah-de-blah and I’m still doing it.

Stephen King once said, “I write like fat ladies diet.” On and on and on.  If you’re Stephen King, you can do whatever you want.  Under the Dome is huge; you could use it to stop a fire door.  But go back to some of his earlier works, specifically Carrie, his first published novel, and the difference is vast.   Carrie is noticeably shorter.  Experience doesn’t always mean longer books, but by the time you publish forty-plus novels, you better have a handle on what you’re doing.  Under the Dome is long because it has to be, and because SK’s publishers know that his fans will buy it even if they have to cart it around in a wheelbarrow.  You, the unknown, will not be so lucky.

With blogs like Ms Mini’s and other sources of information, proper formatting for a book manuscript isn’t some arcane knowledge writers must travel to a guru’s cave to learn.  There really isn’t any excuse except being too lazy to seek it, or too egotistical to believe that one’s precious manuscript might need reformatting, editing or some other help to catch a jaded agent’s eye.

Fonts can make a big difference.  I’m not talking about shrinking from 12-point to ten.  That would cause severe eyestrain and land your manuscript in the round file immediately.  I mean choosing a professional font, which is NOT Edwardian Script or Jokerman. I was using Courier New, an acceptable font that is easy for me to read, but it’s bigger than Times New Roman.  When I changed fonts, the page count went down so far I wasn’t sure I was looking at the same book.  It looks better, too.

It’s still too long.

One caveat:  when extensively revising and reformatting, don’t forget to regularly SAVE YOUR WORK.  Something went wrong with my document and I lost all the chapter reordering and cuts that I had done past a certain point.  I had to redo them from scratch.  Lucky for me my notes page remained intact.  Blargh!

I’ll let Ms Mini explain the finer points of professional manuscript formatting to you.  Please read her blog.  If you learn as much as possible about proper presentation and querying, then the only excuse you’ll have left for the file box full of rejections is that you just can’t write, or you’ve just quit trying.

If you have any comments on the subject of formatting and presentation, please share below.

Places

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Check out some famous people’s workspaces:

http://lifehacker.com/5367129/nine-workspaces-where-famous-folks-get-stuff-done

Some people say they can write anywhere.  They prove it by sitting in public with their laptops while life goes on around them, sometimes noisily, happily tapping away or even scribbling in a notebook with an old-fashioned ballpoint pen (mercy!).  Others must have complete silence, or at least its approximation, and an isolated room before they can concentrate.

The space doesn’t matter, as long as it’s compatible with the individual writer’s needs.  If you have a family you may have to adopt a room or an alcove in a busy house and call it your own and make a rule about when Mommy’s door is shut, she is not to be disturbed.  Conversely, if you live alone, you can move around the house or even take the laptop in the backyard without fear of being disturbed.  You can write in a treehouse, if that’s the best place for you.

What are some of the elements that make a good writing space?

  • It should be comfortable.  Whether that means a nice squishy office chair, all blanketed up on the couch or in bed, or the recliner in the den, you shouldn’t have to think about physical discomfort when you write.  The temperature should not be extreme; too cold and you can’t type, too warm and it’s hard to concentrate.
  • Your supplies should be at hand.  I learned this in college when writing papers.  Most people who have a dedicated office already have everything organized.  If you are making do with a corner of the kitchen or family room, make sure before you start that your materials are right there.  It’s a pain to have to get up and fetch a book or load the printer.  Check before you sit down so interruptions stay at a minimum.
  • Not too cluttered.  It’s hard to work amidst piles of teetering pages, books, scattered receipts, rolling pencils, etc.  The mess starts to get to you and you might stop working and start cleaning.  Or, you could end up berating yourself for your lack of organization and retire in self-defeat.
  • Noise levels.  I work better when I have something to ignore, usually music or sometimes the TV, set on low.  You might want a more quiet space, or enjoy playing thrash metal while you pen your latest tome.  Doesn’t matter if it’s loud or soft; whatever helps you get into your trance state.  If you like working in public, your tolerance to noise is probably pretty good.
  • Good lighting.  You can’t work if you can’t see, and straining your eyes will give you a headache.  If you work on a computer, take frequent breaks from looking at the screen.  Even moving your eyes to a different part of the room will give them ease.  Don’t make the screen too bright, either.  Most computers let you adjust that either on the monitor itself or in the Control Panel.

You know to print out a hard copy for editing, right?  Not only will it rest your eyes, but people cannot read effectively on a computer screen for a length of time.  (Kindles aren’t the same, or so I hear.  I wouldn’t know because I’m not spending $400 on something I can’t take into the tub with me.)

All of this holds true for homework, if you’re a student.  A good study space will help your grades immeasurably.  My writing center is on the couch, under a blanket, with the TV on and music playing in my headphones.  I used to do homework there before I finished school.  I can adapt; I’ve written at work, at lunch and at my desk during downtime.  The headphones are a must so I can block out any noise from outside or other people, like in the lunchroom.

I haven’t tried working in a coffee shop or other public venue; I might when I get a smaller netbook with a better battery.  For now, the couch is comfy and since I don’t have a roommate or spouse at the moment, it’s easy to concentrate.

Wherever you work, remember that it is your sacred space, to be used for writing only if you can manage that.  If you keep it so, when you sit down you’ll be ready to go.  If you don’t have a dedicated space, have preparations that get you into the groove.

What’s the best place for you to work and why? Let us know in the comments.